Discrediting Myself – Back to School

I’ve been thinking about this for the last week. School is starting on the 27th for me and I’m doing 4 classes (12 units – full time student). I’m also going to continue to work as much as I can. But this is where the anxiety of school & negative self-talk starts.


I love school and filling my brain with new knowledge so much that I should probably be embarrassed about it. Although, I can become incredibly stressed and burnt out pretty quickly. I’m at a point in college where my general education classes are completed and I can now focus strictly on the classes needed for my major.

The classes I have left to finish at community college are:

  • Cell & Molecular Biology
  • Diversity of Organisms
  • Biochemistry
  • Molecular Biology
  • Genetics
  • General Chemistry A & B
  • Organic Chemistry A & B
  • Calculus 1 & 2 (My goal is to do Honors Calculus)
  • Calculus-Based Physics – Mechanics (Honors is the goal)
  • Calculus-Based Physics – Electricity & Magnetism


However, I can start mentally sabotaging myself when I begin thinking about how many years I’ve been in school and how many classes I have left to complete. A lot of people in high school had already taken Calculus, Statistics, & Physics, so I often begin focusing on how “behind” I am – as if there is some sort of timeline that determines who will be smart and successful. This thought pattern is dangerous. It effects my confidence, my motivation, and my work ethic.

The main thing I began to question, though, was:

“Often times I associate highly intelligent and successful individuals with how little they sleep compared to how much they study. Because my body needs at least 7 hours of sleep per night, I feel as though I will never be as successful or intelligent as others. I am not able to study throughout the night and be able to coherently function on 3 hours of sleep. To be honest, I can’t believe anybody can successfully do it. I feel as though this will be my downfall in school.”

The other, more optimistic side of me tries to make things better by saying, “Everyone is different. They have different limits, different difficulties, and different methods that work for them. While one person may succeed by studying everyday, another can be just as successful by studying, or “cramming” the night before.” But is this really true?

I’m not sure; you tell me.



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