My 100 Days posts have been very choppy lately and, for that, I apologize. So I figure maybe an update is needed. Maybe not. Either way, it would probably be best for me to talk about these things, whether anyone listens/reads it or not. I've been reading a lot about astrology lately and even discovered …
A Different Life in My Head
I do wonder if this is a sign of yet another undiagnosed mental illness. I have a separate life in my head that I frequently think about. Really, it's hard to put into words. I imagine myself, in similar situations, but having different reactions than what I physically express. Right now, I almost feel like …
Day 38/100
MARCH 27 List 20 positive affirmations about yourself without looking any up. I am so much stronger than I believe Happiness is something that I will achieve My ambition grows everyday Mental illness does not define who I am I have control of my life and will no longer give it to anybody else I …
Day 30/100
MARCH 17 Write down 5 regrets. Accept them as learning experiences & forgive yourself. Getting into an abusive relationship that I was fully aware of. I gave up friends, family, and myself. I struggle, still, with PTSD from the days where he tried to kill me and knew how to get into my house undetected. …
Day 29/100
MARCH 16 What advice would you give your younger self & do you follow it now? Oh wow. This post can either be extremely transparent or completely useless. Lets go with the former! The advice that I would give my younger self would be to not rush life. I've always been an immediate gratification kind …
Heartbroken by Alcohol
This picture is an accurate depiction of my emotions, thoughts, and anxiety.. I'm at a crossroads; I don't know which direction to go. My codependency says to me, "Help them. They need you." My logical mind says, "You've tried. The only person you can help now is yourself." I've lost count on how many empty …
Between the Devil and the Deep Blue Sea
For the past week, I've been in such a rut that I can't seem to shake. I rack my brain trying to figure out where this is coming from; where does this feeling originate? What I keep coming back to is this: I'm unhappy. I keep telling myself that I need to just keep things …
Day 9/100
FEBRUARY 17 What place are you grateful for? Today, I am feeling especially grateful for my work. Recently, it hasn't been good at home and, since I have a key to the office, I can go enjoy the quiet there while I work or study. I'm fortunate to have a job where I can just …
No excuse
I could give you so many excuses as to why my blog is not being updated. I could tell you that I'm studying or working or doing more important things. I could tell you things that would seemingly be more respectable. But the truth is, I'm not. Realistically, I've thought everyday about leaving this world, …
allynikk.wordpress.com 